Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Of Troops and Trojans

Predictably enough, Ian's article, "Fuck the Troops," has elicited some outrage among right-wing bloggers. In fact, a lot of outrage. There has been much posting of our address, pictures, website info, and even overhead pictures of our location. Explicit incitements to violence and death threats are too numerous to list here. Classy bunch, these conservatives. Apparently, the randomly selected Google advertisers featured here will be getting some letters.

But what really has us upset is that some tech-challenged dumbass at Little Green Footballs--a popular Neocon blog named after boogers--posted a warning that our website was riddled with viruses, hamstringing the controversy as it began. The tragic outcome was that when Free Republic.com, the white whale of Right Wing retardation on the internet, posted the link, it was taken down just as the outrage was brewing. Additionally, nearly every other blog post about it contains the spurious virus warning.

We want to stress to both our fans and our aspiring assasins: We have checked it out thoroughly, and there's no fucking virus on our site. What happened to this guy is simple: He had downloaded a trojan from somewhere else--most likely porn-related--which was triggered when he clicked on a link to paypal from our site.

So, to be clear: There is no trojan virus on our website. There are trojan viruses, however, which lay dormant on your PC until you access Paypal.com, triggering them, presumably to record and transmit your personal info. So, if someone were to click the "donate" or "subscribe" buttons on our site, which link to Paypal, it would trigger such a virus, just as any link to Paypal on any website would. By the way, this still wouldn't work if you used Firefox instead of IE.

Again, no viruses, scout's honor. So please, Freepers, come back! Oh, and by the way, thanks for empowering us to speak for half the people in the country! Boy, is Obama gonna be surprised when he finds out what he thinks!